I'm coming out later in life and I'm terrified

I'm in my forties and only now putting words to something I've felt for decades. Part of me is relieved. Part of me is terrified of what changes — my marriage, my kids, my church community, all of it. I've spent so long performing a version of myself that I'm not sure I know who I actually am underneath. I keep starting coming-out conversations in my head and never finishing them. For those who came out later, what was the hardest part nobody warned you about?